Breakfast On Pluto

Allow me to begin by say that I do love my wife, bless her heart. However, with that detail attended to I think I should say a few things as she has recently posted what I would consider a lie. In her post "Ceiling Fairy" she was quoted as saying "We are very excited for the 4th of July." This is a drastic overstatement at best, a cold and calculating lie at worst.

If you'll stick with me for the next few lines I will explain in a brief and complete way why this is a false hood. To begin with she, and most of you, know that I do not often do my celebrating on the 4th unless it is thrust upon. I traditionally celebrate of the 5th of July as per SOP. This is where the first hole can be punched clean through this slanderous statement. The second and ultimately more condemning hole gets punched into her logic with simple verbiage. "excited" Now I put this forth to everyone reading, when was the last time I appeared to be excited about doing anything? Ok, perhaps you may be able to come up with something, but append that question like this "When was the last time I was excited about anything involving a large number of people?" and it becomes very clear that this was indeed a lie.

What makes this even more insidious is that she had the nerve to post this is full view of the internet. Hiding in plain site comes to mind. Sure I rarely read blogs, including my own, but walk the line long enough and you will fall off. You should be ashamed.